Thursday, July 10, 2003

I didn’t think there were still people out there that don’t at least understand the concept of voicemail even if they haven’t used it.

A mother? grandmother? redneck from the sticks? called to inquire about her boy-child’s status. Why hasn’t he been moved when everyone else has been and gone? We get this question a lot. There are a number of factors on why your criminal loved one may be rotting away in a local jail when you and he know very well that he’s supposed to be in a cushy federal lockup:

1. This is the federal government - we do everything slowly.
2. Paperwork gets lost.

OK, so there are only two. It’s enough…

Anyway, back to the point of my post. I explained that the criminal clerk was gone for the day and that she could leave a voicemail and the clerk would call her back tomorrow (not really, she never calls family members back, but it sounds good).

HER: I can’t talk to someone today?

ME: No, I’m sorry, the criminal clerk handles it.

HER: There’s no one there that can answer my question?

**There is nothing like having to repeat myself to make me really happy.**

ME: No, ma’am, she’s the one that handles it. I can transfer you to her extension and you can leave her a voicemail.

HER: What’s that?

I explain the concept of voicemail.

HER: Can’t I just leave a message with you?

ME: It’s really better if you leave her a message directly in her voicemail.

HER: How do I get there?

This after I just explained the technology to her. I explain it again.

HER: (huffy sigh) Well, I suppose that’s what I’ll have to do.

Yep...our criminal clerk has the patience of a saint sometimes. Sometimes...others she’s as snarky as I.