From a friend via email:

The following is an excerpt from a children’s book, Captain Underpants And the Perilous Plot of Professor Poopypants by Dave Pilkey. The evil Professor forces everyone to assume names......

Use the third letter of your first name to determine your new first name:

a = poopsie— b = lumpy
c = buttercup— d = gadget
e = crusty—f = greasy
g = fluffy— h = cheeseball
i = chim-chim—j = stinky
k = flunky— l = boobie
m = pinky— n = zippy
o = goober— p = doofus
q = slimy—r = loopy
s = snotty— t = tootie
u = dorkey— v = squeezit
w = oprah—x = skipper
y = dinky—z = zsa-zsa

Use the second letter of your last name to determine the first half of your new last name:

a = apple—b = toilet
c = giggle—d = burger
e = girdle—f = barf
g = lizard—h = waffle
i = cootie—j = monkey
k = potty—l = liver
m = banana—n = rhino
o = bubble—p = hamster
q = toad—r = gizzard
s = pizza—t = gerbil
u = chicken—v = pickle
w = chuckle—x = tofu
y = gorilla—z = stinker

Use the fourth letter (less than 4 use the last letter) of yourlast name to determine the second half of your new last name:

a = head—b = mouth
c = face—d = nose
e = tush—f = breath
g = pants—h = shorts
i = lips—j = honker
k = butt—l = brain
m = tushie—n = chunks
o = hiney—p = biscuits
q = toes—r = buns
s= fanny—t = sniffer
u = sprinkles—v = kisser
w = squirt—x = humperdinck
y = brains—z = juice

Thus, for example, George W. Bush’s new name is Goober Chickenshorts. Now when you SEND THIS ON...use your new name as the subject. And remember that children laugh an average of 146 times a day; adults laugh an average of 4 times a day. Put more laughter in your day!

The post title result is using my real full name. Using Jen Speaks as my blog name, I get Zippy Hamsterhead. Equally amusing.

What’s your name?

All viewpoints are welcome. Please keep your comments profanity free. Do not flame others. HTML links will not work. Please just post any links as is in your comment.

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1. How appropriate that our last name would start with “Cootie”!  I am Loopy Cootieshorts ~ which is how I am feeling today with not enough sleep.

   Posted by  on  04/07/05  at  12:09 PM

2. BTW ~ would you email that to me so I can print it for a future ice breaker.

   Posted by  on  04/07/05  at  12:10 PM

3. No need to email. You can copy & paste it just as you would anything else.

   Posted by  on  04/07/05  at  12:20 PM

4. I am Buttercup Cootiebutt.

   Why am I distubed by having the word butt twice in my new name?

   And why is my new name the same as the Princess Bride’s?

   Posted by Michael  on  04/07/05  at  01:03 PM

5. I’m Loopy Cootiefanny.

   Nice.

   Posted by Jared  on  04/07/05  at  01:15 PM

6. I am “Pinky Applesniffer”, with my real name, but “Chim-Chim Applecootie” for my blog name.

   Posted by princess jami  on  04/07/05  at  01:25 PM

7. Michael - your name is nicely rounded. I would be worried about the Princess Bride thing, though.

   Jared - You are loopy.

   jami - Those are great!

   Posted by  on  04/07/05  at  02:13 PM

8. Chim-chim Gigglebuns. Heh.

   Posted by Shrode  on  04/07/05  at  02:14 PM

9. Pinky Banana-Buns at your service!

   Posted by kimberly  on  04/07/05  at  02:39 PM

10. Squeezit Applemouth

    

    Posted by  on  04/07/05  at  03:17 PM

11. Lumpy Gizzardshorts

    Posted by  on  04/07/05  at  05:10 PM

12. Zippy Bubbletush ........ new pr0n name?

    Posted by Tony Rosen  on  04/07/05  at  09:52 PM

13. My name is Chim-Chim Applesniffer.

    I *really* prefer and *want* be called Professor Poopypants. sigh…

    Posted by  on  04/07/05  at  10:58 PM

14. I am Boobie Applenose.  That made me laugh out loud, by myself, at 6:30 in the morning.  Brilliant!

    Posted by Kenny  on  04/08/05  at  07:34 AM

15. I think Kenny wins for the funniest name.

    Posted by  on  04/08/05  at  09:16 AM

16. I’m Zippy Stinkymouth.  FRICKIN’ HILARIOUS!  Even more funny, Denis is also Zippy Stinkymouth.

    Posted by Jaynee  on  04/08/05  at  10:04 AM

17. Mine was Poopsie Girdle Pants LOL

    Posted by Sharon Ferguson  on  04/08/05  at  12:44 PM

18. Dinky Gigglechunks, at your service.

    Posted by Bryan  on  04/11/05  at  03:32 PM

19. This has to be the funniest game I’ve had in a while.

    Posted by  on  04/11/05  at  03:41 PM

20. Poopsie Girdlenose. Are Sharon and I related?

    Posted by Alan K. Henderson  on  04/12/05  at  04:16 AM

21. I love the Captian Underpants series. It takes a certian humor to really enjoy it.

    --Loopy Gizzard Pants

    Posted by Christopher  on  04/12/05  at  08:10 AM

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