Joining the Smug Marrieds

Thursday, June 09, 2005

OK, Mom and I are looking at options for music at the reception.

By the way, are you tired of wedding blogging yet? Because we’ve got six more months of this coming. You’ve been warned.

So…

We’re planning to have the reception in the foyer/Great Room at my church. It is a great space, with a nice area over by the coffee shop (The Great Room) that has little tables and cushy chairs and a fireplace and large picture windows. The rest of the foyer area is a wide expanse of nothing, so we will be able to add more tables as needed and have plenty of room for some musicians. There will be no dancing since we’ll be in the church and it’s not my thing. And it’s not going to be a sit down dinner either, but heavy hors d’ouevres on a buffet.

What’s cool about the space is that they built an internal sound system in that area, so we can play whatever music we want through the system and it’s going to sound fantastic. And by doing recorded music rather than having a live band, we would save a ton of money that could be used on excellent food instead.

But by having piped in music you lose that extra fun element of a live band. We’re looking at a couple possibilities for live music - a local Celtic musicians group and a folk instrumental trio we heard play at my step-aunt’s wedding last year.

I’m looking for your input so you tell me Which is Better?

Live Music

Excellent Food

Leave your opinions in the comments, please.

So my induction to the worship team was fun. I don’t know why, but I expected more than the seven of us that were there. Two were out. They were all very welcoming of me and I was able to do a little networking for Beau’s job hunt up here, which was a nice surprise.

One of the songs we worked on is one that I’m considering for the wedding and so it’s today’s Song of the Day (SOTD). Here is Love is an old hymn written by William Rees/Robert Lowry and rearranged for the Passion: Hymns Ancient and Modern CD. While I like that newer arrangement, I’m thinking we’ll go with the traditional piano for the wedding. But it’s the words that I most love.

Here is Love
Lyrics by William Rees/William Williams, Music by Robert Lowry

Here is love, vast as the ocean
Lovingkindness as the flood
When the Prince of Life, our Ransom
Shed for us His precious blood
Who His love will not remember?
Who can cease to sing His praise?
He can never be forgotten
Throughout Heav’n's eternal days

On the mount of crucifixion
Fountains opened deep and wide
Through the floodgates of God’s mercy
Flowed a vast a gracious tide
Grace and love, like mighty rivers
Poured incessant from above
And Heav’n's peace and perfect justice
Kissed a guilty world in love

Let me all Thy love accepting,
Love Thee, ever all my days;
Let me seek Thy kingdom only
And my life be to Thy praise;
Thou alone shalt be my glory,
Nothing in the world I see.
Thou hast cleansed and sanctified me,
Thou Thyself hast set me free.

In Thy truth Thou dost direct me
By Thy Spirit through Thy Word;
And Thy grace my need is meeting,
As I trust in Thee, my Lord.
Of Thy fullness Thou art pouring
Thy great love and power on me,
Without measure, full and boundless,
Drawing out my heart to Thee.

Monday, June 06, 2005

A couple of you have asked for me to link to my registry here at the blog. That’s a sweet request from you. I will be happy to link to a registry of sorts - my Amazon.com wishlist - where I’ll add some of the stuff that we will have on our official registry. The problem is the anonymity factor here - while I know many of you are harmless, I just don’t want to have our names out there in the WWW. So if you’re really interested in our registry, scroll down the sidebar to my Written Word section and you will see my wishlist link.

Thanks for asking.

LATER: I forgot that I created a bridal registry at Amazon.com with our pseudonyms. Beau joked about taking my last name of Speaks. To find the registry, look for Jen and Beau Speaks, December date, Virginia location. I’ll try to add more stuff than the one book that’s listed right now.

Sunday, June 05, 2005

My wedding gown has been ordered.

We got to the shop and I filled out a customer card. The gal assisting me was great and really listened to what I said I wanted - she and my mother did a great job of bringing dresses that suited my figure pretty well. Although my mother did pick out a couple froufy gowns that I knew I didn’t want but I put them on anyway and she agreed that they were all wrong.

There was one nice one that moved to the top of the list after I had tried on about 5 dresses. But that particular dress had some beading that looked somewhat cheap. That specific dress wasn’t going to be it, but we kept it handy because I loved the sleeves.

The assistant reminded me that they could alter any dress, including adding sleeves to a strapless dress. So I tried on a strapless dress and fell in love. It was gorgeous and if I was slimmer and getting married in August, then I would have chosen it as is. The amazing thing was that I was squeezed into a dress two sizes too small and it still looked perfect. So a short conversation with the seamstress followed, price was discussed with Mom, and the dress was selected!

Total shopping time: 1 hour 20 minutes.

I can’t link to the specific dress, but I can give you the link for the designer - Bonny. My dress has similar elements to this one and maybe this one, but not really. :grin: Since I’ll be getting married in December sleeves are a must, so we’re having it altered to add long sleeves in chiffon. It’s gorgeous.

And the best part is that my sister’s veil will go perfectly; I just need to find a new headpiece that will coordinate with the beading on my dress versus the lace that was on my sisters.

Next up: bridesmaids and flower girl dresses. (Note to Jaynee: please look at dresses at the Bonny site.)

Friday, June 03, 2005

The hunt for the bridal gown begins in earnest tomorrow. Some hours have been spent perusing websites, so I have a general idea of what I’m looking for, but I’ll start trying them on in the morning.

I hate to shop.

I hate trying on clothes.

These two things will make tomorrow a challenge for my mother and

I

me (incorrect use of me/I drives me nuts, I can’t believe that got past me), but I’m determined to stay pleasant for the duration. I’m gritting my teeth already in preparation.

One thing about the gowns online - 90% that I’ve seen are strapless. I’m getting married in December - I need sleeves, preferably long ones, because it’ll be cold. Nothing more lovely than a blue and shivering bride on her wedding day, right? Although that would take care of the Something Blue. Heh.

Thursday, June 02, 2005

The following was sent by my future mother-in-law.

Educational degrees for men:

For those of you who are married, were married, or are contemplating marriage - under the assumption that men need (or ought) to be trained for marriage. Southwest Tech is offering a new 2 year associates degree….

TWO YEAR DEGREE: Becoming a Real Man. That’s right, in just six mini-mesters, you, too, can be a real man as well as earn an associates degree in MA (Male Arts). Please take a moment to look over the program outline.

FIRST YEAR:

Autumn Schedule:

> MEN 101 Combating Stupidity

> MEN 102 You, Too, Can Do Housework

> MEN 103 PMS-Learn When to Keep Your Mouth Shut

> MEN 104 Women Do Not Want Sleazy Under things for Christmas

Winter Schedule:

> MEN 110 Laundry Techniques

> MEN 111 Understanding the Female Response to getting in at 2AM

> MEN 112 Parenting: It Doesn’t End with Conception

> EAT 100 Get a Life, Learn to Cook

> EAT 101 Get a Life, Learn to Cook II

> ECON 001A What’s Hers is Hers

Spring Schedule:

> MEN 120 How NOT to Act Like a Buttface When You’re Wrong

> MEN 121 Understanding Your Incompetence

> MEN 122 YOU, the Weaker Sex

> MEN 123 Reasons to Give Flowers

> ECON 001C What Was Yours is Hers

SECOND YEAR:

Autumn Schedule:

> SEX 101 You CAN Fall Asleep without It

> SEX 102 Morning Dilemma: If It’s Awake, Take a Shower

> SEX 103 How to Stay Awake After Sex

> MEN 201 How to Put the Toilet Seat Down

> Elective (See Electives Below)

Winter Schedule:

> MEN 210 The Remote Control: Overcoming Your Dependency

> MEN 211 How to Not Act Younger than Your Children

> MEN 212 You, Too, Can Be a Designated Driver

> MEN 213 Honest, You Don’t Look Like Tom Cruise or Billy Dee

> MEN 230A Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important

 

Spring Schedule:

> MEN 220 Omitting %&*! from Your Vocabulary (Pass/Fail Only)

> MEN 221 Fluffing the Blanket After Farting Is Not Necessary

> MEN 222 Real Men Ask for Directions

> MEN 223 Thirty Minutes of Begging is NOT Considered Foreplay

> MEN 230B Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important 2

Course Electives:

> EAT 201 Cooking with Tofu

> EAT 202 Utilization of Eating Utensils

> EAT 203 Burping and Belching Discreetly

> MEN 231 Mothers-in-law

> MEN 232 Appear to Be Listening

> MEN 233 Just Say “Yes, Dear”

> ECON 001C Cheaper to Keep Her

I feel like I’ve lost time. I have been swamped at work this week. When I’m at home I’m looking at wedding stuff and hanging with ECD and Holly. I haven’t been to my church in two weeks because of travel.

And then there’s my fiance, whom I adore and happily add to the mix. But the long distance relationship is a challenge for both of us and we don’t live too far apart.

I’ve got six months before I’m married, but already I’m looking forward to the peace and quiet that will come when Beau and I come back from our honeymoon and start living a more normal life. It’s a comforting thought that I think is going to help hold me together when I’m ready to tear out my hair because of wedding details and such.

I’m adding a new category here - Wedding Mania.

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Beau is a teacher by profession. He happens to be a very good teacher.

We spent some time on Monday shooting in the field behind our friends’ home. His Shooting Buddy loaned us two guns and forgive my mangling of the caliber and whatnot, I’m a novice. The first gun I learned to shoot was a .22 revolver. The target was a copy of Osama’s head stapled to a box. I managed to hit the paper pretty well. The smallest holes are from the .22 - the small hole just to the left of the bullseye mark is from my second or third shot. Not too shabby.

From the .22 we moved to a Glock 9mm. Those are the medium sized holes. I managed to hit him in the face quite a few times. Then I shot Beau’s Glock 40cal - those are the next larger holes. I hit the shot between his eyes with that one. And a lot of those holes came from Beau, too.

Then I shot Beau’s .44 Magnum and almost lost my arm. I only shot one round with that since my arms were getting tired. I don’t have that target - we had switched the papers in order for me to save Osama to show the guys in the office.

Finally, we put a fresh sheet on the box and I loaded up a few rounds in the 9mm to close out the lesson. I felt the most comfortable with that gun. Turns out that after shooting with the heavier guns my aim improved. With that last shot I was done for the day.

As I said, Beau is a good teacher. And the guys in the office were impressed. I could get into this hobby.

Most of Sunday was spent at Beau’s church - a sweet congregation of about 50 people in a traditional, reformed (take note, Jared!) Baptist church in the country. I have to admit to a bit of culture shock since it had been many years since I had worshipped in such a traditional church. But I loved the old hymns with the organ and piano and I appreciated the teaching and message in the morning.

The evening service was an old fashioned hymn sing. We sang for the full hour and my vocal chords were happy but tired after singing those high notes. Interestingly, I only knew about half of the hymns we sang - we sang some very old hymns and I was grateful to be able to sight read the notes, otherwise I would have spent more time just listening. There were full harmonies, the piano was lyrical (the pastor’s wife is an amazing player), and the words of the songs were rich in testimony and meaning.

After the singing was a pot luck and time of fellowship. Beau’s friends clearly adore him and they welcomed me warmly, especially when they learned of our engagement. I was grateful to be accepted to nicely. I knew I was in when a couple of the older ladies, who have kind of adopted Beau, hugged me tight. Every person told me how sweet he is, which I know already, but it’s nice to get the confirmation.

I most appreciated meeting his very good friends from West Virginia and his shooting buddy. Shooting Buddy loaned us a couple guns for me to learn how to shoot, but that the next post to come. Stay tuned…

My hosts for the weekend were also our matchmakers. They are dear family friends who have known me since I was six years old. We were fellow aliens in the UK together when he (known as BB) and my Dad were on exchange to the Royal Air Force and Navy, respectively. His wife (known as MB) and my mother became good friend with each other. And we kids (they have two, KB and JB) were constantly over at each other’s houses since we live next door to each other.

Taking you back, MB is the one who called my mother to say she had a guy for me to meet. I’m too lazy to link to the original post about that. But Beau and I knew that they would be very excited about the news of our engagement. On the way to their house after seeing SW3, we debated just telling them right away or letting them catch sight of the ring or what. We decided on a mix of both.

We arrived and hugs were exchanged all around. It had been several years since I had seen them - at my sister’s wedding eight years ago. So we spent several minutes just catching up in the kitchen while we finished putting dinner together. At one point, I noticed BB looking at my hand, but he never said anything and then the conversation turned to our budding romance and I can’t remember exactly what was said, but Beau mentioned that we had done some shopping and I put my hand out to show off the ring. More hugs and tears and then we had a celebratory dinner together that was much fun. At one point when we were clearing up the phone rang and it was KB calling, so I shared the happy news with my childhood friend (Hi, K!).

The whole weekend was a delight and my hosts made me feel right at home and very comfortable. Thanks so much for your warm hospitality, friends. I look forward to my next visit - soon, I hope.

Tuesday, May 31, 2005

I had a busy day at work, so I was unable to post the rest of what I wanted about the weekend. So here’s a quick list of things I wanted to cover:

1. My hosts
2. Beau’s church
3. Learning to shoot

Doesn’t seem like much, but I was afraid I’d forget later.

Posts to come…

This post will remain at the top of the page for today. Scroll down for newer posts, including the recap of my weekend.

Click here to see other views of my sparkly engagement ring. We did not buy my ring ring from BB&B, but from another jeweler that carries Tacori.

It all started several weeks ago when I was talking with my mother about Beau and she said that if we got to the point of considering marriage then she wanted us to have her mother’s wedding set - we could do what we wanted with the diamonds. Wow. That is a generous and meaningful gift.

Meanwhile Beau and I were talking about marriage and goofing about rings - swapping links to pretty rings via email. And then somehow it turned more serious and the above ring was the one that jumped out at me one day. So I saved the link, just in case, not really thinking that I would have that ring.

After our family dinner on Wednesday, Beau asked my Dad for permission to marry me to which my father gave his approval and then Mom handed him the ring box. In the car, we made plans to look at rings on Saturday when I was in H’burg - just to see what was out there and to talk about maybe just resizing and cleaning my grandmother’s rings.

Those rings have sentimental value of course. The wedding ring is from Tiffany & Co. The center diamond in the engagement ring was my great-grandfather’s - my grandmother’s father. So we decided to keep the wedding band for sure and when we got to the jewelers we talked pricing on the cleaning/resizing of the existing rings. And then Beau suggested we look at the Tacori rings in stock.

Almost immediately I spotted The Ring in the case. I was surprised they had it in stock, but I was happy to try it on. Turns out it was in my size and then the guy said they could remount my grandmother’s diamond in 20-30 minutes. Wow.

“We’re going to go outside and talk,” I said. For several minutes Beau and I weighed the options - be practical and frugal or not. I told him to decide - that I was fine with either option - and I really was fine with keeping the existing rings because of their meaning and they are lovely. So we went in and I wasn’t sure what he had decided until he told me to try on the Tacori ring again.

“We’ll take that one,” and we then waited more like an hour for them to measure and all that they do to diamonds before they reset it in the new ring and then appraised it and all that jazz. Once that was done, they boxed it up and put it in a bag and handed it to Beau. We walked outside and he told me to sit on the bench where we had discussed the rings and he knelt on one knee and asked me to marry him and I said, “Well, yeah!” There was smooching and he put the ring on my finger.

Wedding date: December 30, 2005.

So much for my vow, right?

Thursday, May 26, 2005

I spent the day with Beau and his family yesterday - his parents were on this side of the country after their return from Ireland, so we thought it would be smart to have us meet before they head home to California tomorrow. He picked me up in the morning and we headed north to his sister’s abode, where we had a nice lunch with her and his parents. (Thanks, again, Beau’s Sis!) From there we went on a tour of Miller House in Hagerstown, MD, which is a lovely historical home. After the tour we stopped at Beau’s niece’s home where I was able to meet her and her adorable children. From there we went to the restaurant for the larger family dinner gathering. At that point my parents joined the group as well as Beau’s brother and his wife and her sister and husband. Are you confused yet? Beau’s niece’s husband joined us then, too. There were 15 of us all together and we had a great time with pretty much everyone telling me that I had managed to nab the sweetest guy, which wasn’t news to me but was very nice to hear. And they were incredibly welcoming to me and my parents for which I am grateful. I think our families will blend very well together and I look forward to getting to know all of them better.

Now we just need to introduce Beau to the rest of my family. He has no idea what he’s in for with our motley crew.

To Beau’s Mom and Dad - thanks again for a fun day and for the dinner. I will be sending you that email today.

To the rest of Beau’s family - it was great to meet all of you. I look forward to more fun gatherings like that - it was great to laugh over a good meal.

ONE MORE THING: I did not see the finale of LOST last night, of course. However, I do plan to watch it tonight - so no spoilers, please!

I do know the final of American Idol - I would have been happy with either as winner. Both are great and will have good careers. I did record the show and will try to watch it soon. I hear it was pretty good. I did watch the last segment to see the announcement.